Volume 3 Issue 5 May, 2013
Self Respect
In early 1978, when I was working at occupation therapy & rehabilitation unit, where most patients residing were deserted by their families. None had any reliable residential address. Many inmates would live together as family. One day when I was sitting in my room, two youngsters in their early twenties entered and told me that were looking for their sister who was admitted many years ago. They said that they were very young when the sister was admitted to the psychiatry hospital by father and they were keen on taking the sister home. This was an unexpected event for us and I was thrilled imagining the event of seeing the patient’s reunion with her family.
I sent for their sister, Kaveri (name not real), who was working in a OT unit. She came neatly dressed, well kempt, but bearing the usual expression less face. I said with excitement “Look, your brothers have come to see you and they want to take you home.” But to my amazement she looked at them casually and asked me “How do you know that these are my brothers? Ask them where were they all these years?” I could suddenly see (never seen) expression of pent up anger on her face as she turned to those youngsters and said “I have never seen you so far. I have no brothers or sisters or anyone in this world. I don’t want to go anywhere from here and would stay here till I die.” Now she was livid with anger and shouted “I was brought here by your father and after admitting me here he never turned up. Now why has he sent you here? Tell him I am happy here and I do not want to come home.” The brothers shocked by her reaction tried to explain that they were too young at that time and it was no fault of theirs. But Kaveri did not change her stance. Tears rolled from the brothers’ eyes; yet they failed to soften her stand. My attempts to alleviate her feelings and to persuade her failed. She was firm in her decision. As the whole thing had come to an impasse she got up to go back to her room. One of her brothers took out few notes of money from his pocket and offered them to her. She again became angry and said “I am paid for the work I do here” and she walked away. I looked helplessly at them. I felt sorry for them. At the same time was able to understand Kaveri’s feelings. I appreciated the way she stood up for herself and took such a hard decision. Her decision reflected the self respect she had, which was hidden from us till then.
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